family, Life, motherhood, parenting, pregnancy

11 Things That Happen Upon Entering Motherhood

The journey of starting motherhood is one that you can truly never forget. It is a time of many changes, both physically and emotionally. It is a time of learning to embrace your body in a way you never thought would be possible. And of course, it is a time you will never forget, because, let’s be honest, how can you forget a time in your life that a simple smell could make you throw up your morning breakfast or the fact that every time you ate you thought about how much you could relate to the saying “Set your soul on fire “.

But what about after the pregnancy journey comes to an end? That’s the part women need to talk more about, as it is a crucial part of the journey, the true start of motherhood. Aside from, “you’re never going to sleep now” comments, no one talks about the initial aftermath of labor and the first few months of your tiny humans’ life. And let me tell you. It’s not all rainbows and butterflies.

  1. You will need diapers for yourself. Diapers apparently are not just for your baby or 90-year-old grandmother with a small bladder, you too, will be needing what practically seems like depends for yourself when you get home from the hospital. I kid you not. Oh & make sure you grab yourself those granny panties you never thought you would wear. Because you definitely will wear them for months to come.
  2. Cabbage will be on your grocery list and you won’t be eating it anymore. If you’re planning to not breastfeed, you’re going to need to buy a head of cabbage and put a tight sports bra on with gigantic cabbage leaves in there for support. Apparently, this “helps” to dry you out. While you’re awaiting your milk production to stop, beware of the severe pain of the slightest poke, you might as well wear a sign around that states “Caution may explode at any minute”.
  3. You will be an emotional wreck. You will cry for no reason. You will also likely scream for no reason as well. You soon will understand those surveys the doctor office makes you take in the first few months of your newborns life asking about how you’re feeling. It makes sense that we as mothers will be a hormonal mess. BUT, no one openly discusses the intensity of the after-labor effects on your emotions.
  4. Number 3 leads into number 4. The thing you did not think would be possible. You will hate everything your significant other does. Motherly instinct kicks in immediately and suddenly you will feel like you know it all. And you will not want your significant other, or anyone else for that matter, doing things their way. You will hate the way they hold the baby. The way they burp the baby. The way they wash the bottles. The way they don’t wash the bottles. At one point, you might just hate the way they are breathing. Until you realize that you are not super mom and you do not know it all, and you too are just learning how to be a parent, ease up on your significant other. After all, you are both entering this life changing journey of parenthood together.
  5. Spit up becomes your daily perfume. You will smell like spit up 90% of the time. No matter how much you shower or saturate yourself in perfume, spit up overcomes all. When you lay your head down at the end of the night and kiss your hubby goodnight, be prepared to hear “you smell like formula” instead of receiving the “you’re so beautiful” comments before bed.
  6. Your baby sleeps better on your chest than in their own bed. At the end of a long evening, you just got your baby to fall fast asleep on your chest. You lie him/her in bed and suddenly they are wide awake. This is the moment you will realize why parents co-sleep. We are quick to judge co-sleeping, but once you start what seems like hallucinating from sleep deprivation, you become more aware of why parents may choose to co-sleep.
  7. Everything your child does is the most adorable thing you have ever seen. You may say you were not going to be “that mom” who posted 1,000 pics on your social media of your new tiny human making the same face a dozen times, but then suddenly, you look back at your most recent posts and realize 99% are all of your child making the same face in every. single. one.
  8. Nights out turn into days out. Yes, you read that right. There are now very few “nights out”, because just like your new child has a bedtime, you will as well. The days of being able to stay out until 11pm or later are now a true struggle. All of the sudden it is as if your internal clock sprung ahead 4 hours and BOOM! You find yourself lying in bed by 7pm. Now you find yourself making dinner reservations for 5pm, instead of the usual 7-8pm time slots. The good in all of this, open table ALWAYS has a reservation open at this time for a party of 2 at the hottest restaurants in just about any city. Trust me. It is a HUGE plus.

Although, hard to believe after reading the first 8 things that you will likely experience at the start of the journey, I promise the beginning of motherhood is truly a beautiful journey that you will remember the way it made you feel for the rest of your life. Motherhood is beautiful. It is frustrating. It is exciting. It is long days and even longer nights. It is pure bliss. It is real happiness. It is unconditional love. I like to call motherhood a beautiful disaster.

Side note: Don’t be a regular parent. Be a cool parent. Still listen to some gangsta rap, so in 20 years from now you can break some out & show your human just how cool you use to be.

Now, onto a few good things that happen at the beginning of this amazing journey of motherhood. Onto the next one, on, on to the next one.

9. You will fall in love harder than you have ever experienced. It is true when people tell you, there is no love like the bond between a mother and her child. BUT, it is not until you actually have your own, that you will finally understand. There really is no love like it. It is a love so strong, that seeing your baby cry when he gets his first set of shots will bring tears to your eyes too. Apologize to your baby daddy in advanced for he will no longer be your #1. We mothers know it takes two to create these perfect tiny humans we refer to as our children, but they now are suddenly the center of our universe.

10. Everything Changes. And I mean everything. There is no more me, myself & I, or we, it is All. About. YOUR CHILD. Some people may think of this as a negative change, but I promise it is a the most rewarding life change you will experience. It is a change that brings personal growth. Children challenge you. They challenge you to become less selfish. They challenge you to become a professional multi tasker. They challenge you to try new things. For instance, all of the fruits and veggies your 27-year-old self will not eat off of your plate. Because how else will you get your child to eat them without proving just how yummy they are. Lastly, but more importantly, they challenge you to be patient. When Becoming a mother change is inevitable, but just remember the only constant entity in life is change and motherhood is just a step in the right direction to creating a happy and fulfilling life.

11. Children Bring you closer to your spouse/significant other. This may seem contradicting to #4, but hear me out. Although, there will be disagreements on how you should or should not raise your new tiny human, seeing your significant other interact with your little one will make you fall even MORE IN LOVE with them. More than you ever thought would be possible. So much so, that you will wonder how the divorce rate is so high these days for parents who have children together. No matter how annoying your significant other can be at times, the way you see them love your child is truly the HEART EYES EMOJI. I know I am not the only one who would love to lock their hubby, hubby to be, baby daddy, in the basement and throw away the key sometimes, but at the end of the day you two now share the most special bond, the love of your child. The one you created together. The one you will raise together. The one who you both cried together when you first laid eyes on them. That is an undeniable pull on the heart strings to love the one you’re with even more than you did before your tiny human came along.

Entering motherhood has its ups and downs in the first few months. It’s like the first day at a new school. You’re ultimately walking into an established setting where people have already decided who is and who is not a part of the clique and they tell you, “Sorry, you can’t sit with us”. It is scary. You have to keep another human aside from yourself alive. You have to feed them. Clothe them. Bathe them. Change them. Teach them. Guide them. You’re truly entering a world of unknowns. But what fun would life be if we always knew what to expect each day we awoke? That is what motherhood is all about. The unexpected. The greatest adventure life brings. A real beautiful disaster.

 Motherhood is a roller coaster ride. Prepare to buckle up, hang on tight and enjoy the ride, because the views up here are overall pretty damn rad.

 & P.S.- Don’t forget the depends.

Careers, Good Vibes, Life, Millennials, Overcoming Obstacles, positivity

5 Signs You’re The Reason Why Your Life Is So Complicated

Often times we hold individuals other than ourselves accountable when life is not working out in our favor. When in reality, the individual responsible for your life being complicated is the one you look at in the mirror each day.  Whether you’re in a current state of denial that you are the reason your life is “difficult” or you are slowly beginning to realize now is the time to take action to make your life less complicated, here are 5 red flags that YOU are the reason your life is complicated and that YOU need to make some changes to your life ASAP.

  1. You complain every day about how much you hate your job, but you continue to stay.

If when asked, “What is your favorite thing about your job?” & your answer is “My lunch break and leaving”, you should probably start looking elsewhere. So, you stay because you have bills. Well guess what, everyone has bills, unless of course you are under the age of 18 and still have the support of family, or over the age of 30 and still living in your parents basement free of charge. We spend most of our time at our jobs. At least 8+ hours a day, 5 times per week, to be exact. Therefore, you must enjoy what you do. If you find yourself complaining day in and day out, do something about it. No one is FORCING you to stay at your miserable job. No one is actually “locking you up & throwing away the key”. By staying in a job that you hate, you’re the only one keeping yourself prisoner.

Do yourself a favor, edit your resume, perfect your resume, do some soul searching, and feed your hungry soul by applying to new positions that truly appeal to your passions.

Leave that miserable job and stop complaining.

2)Your list of “hobbies” only consists of going out to the bar several times a week.

From your mid-twenties on, you should by now begin to develop hobbies & interests. If the only thing you enjoy and have fun doing is drinking, your life is going to continue to be complicated. Alcohol is a depressant; it’s not meant to bring you up, although at times, it makes for some occasional great memories and hilarious stories to tell your friends. Save the social drinking for the weekend and spend more time during the week finding out what you truly enjoy doing. Join a recreational sports team, read more books, pick up a cooking class, learn something NEW.

If you keep doing the same things that you’ve always done, you will keep getting the SAME results.

Get out of your comfort zone & discover new things. Only then will your life slowly start to change in a positive manner and become less complicated.

& Perhaps you will even stop meeting “significant others” while intoxicated at the bar, this is another complication that stems from your so called “hobby” of binge drinking.

3) You always try to please everyone and you’re always the YES MAN.

You say yes to things you do not want to do, which ultimately leads to you taking on more than you can handle at once. You often find yourself feeling bad saying the word NO. You get exhausted from the constant pleasing of others, news flash, YOUR FAULT! I cannot stress enough that the word NO should be used in your everyday vocabulary. If you’re always the YES MAN, people will recognize the trait and use it to their advantage. You will always be the last one out of the office, the planner of all gatherings & the driver on all road trips. You will never have the opportunity to be the passenger who gets to sit back, relax and enjoy the ride of life!

Learn to say no when you do not want to participate in an activity, learn to say no when you have a pile of work up to your eyeballs, and mostly importantly learn to say NO for YOURSELF.

Mental health is key people, and stressing yourself out is only going to set your chakras off balance.

4) You seek constant approval on how to live your life based on the opinions of others.

If you never make decisions on your own and often find yourself asking others around you for opinions, this is another reason why you are the reason that your life is so complicated. If someone other than yourself is constantly telling you how to live your own life, it’s no longer YOUR life to be lived, it’s basically multiple people living on your behalf.

Life is about making the wrong decisions and learning from them.

 If you cannot trust the one person who you should trust the most, why should you trust others to help guide your life in a direction that they believe to be the right direction for you? At the end of the day, you of all people should be able to know what the best decision is for you. Life is not supposed to always be easy, but you sure don’t need to make it any more complicated than it already is.

Opinions from others are great every now and then, just don’t ask too many people for their opinions because you will make decisions more complicated than they need to be.

5) You spend too much time with others, rather than spending time with yourself

Human nature is to seek affection and comfort. So, it’s no surprise that we navigate towards spending more time with others than we do alone. This however is unhealthy and the only person it hurts is YOURSELF. When you spend more time alone you will discover that it’s not so bad after all. You may even begin to enjoy spending more time on your own, than with anyone else for that matter.

Spending time alone allows you to think more deeply, connect to your mind, body & soul. When you truly understand yourself, your needs & your love language, connecting with the right people will come more natural. When you spend too much time with others, you focus so much on making a connection with someone else that your unable to connect with yourself.

Seeking constant comfort or connections will complicate actually forming true connections with anyone. If you always feel like you’re going to “die alone”, start by not forcing things to happen, let them fall into place accordingly. Relationships & connections are two things that should never feel forced.

I could ramble on for hours as to why you are the reason that your life is so complicated, but I think #5 is a great place to stop. I hate to be negative Nancy, but if your friends/family/peers won’t tell you that YOU are your OWN worst enemy and the reason as to why you’re stuck in a rut, I’ll do it on their behalf.

I too was once in your position and the sole reason for my seemingly complicated life and wish someone would have provided me the same insight I’m providing you.

I once saw a quote that said:

“Life is a long complicated road, but not if you put an “S” in front of every mile”…

Smile. I know it’s hard sometimes when your life is “complicated”, but make more time to seriously smile and enjoy the beautiful mess we are all, because we are all in it together.

You might not see it now, but there are bigger fish to fry and only YOU can make your own life less complicated.


Photo by Jordan Sanchez on Unsplash

Careers, Life, Millennials, Stereotypes

5 Things “Millennials” want other generations to stop saying:

Let me start by saying this is not in any way, shape, or form meant to offend generations that are not categorized as “millennials”. I’m simply sharing the thoughts of an analytically speaking “millennial” who is sick of being categorized and judged based off an age group that I just so happen to fall into.

(Please, please tell me why you always hatin’?)

Note: Since I’m a “millennial” and all, I think it’s acceptable to toss in a line from a YG rap song, if you don’t know this line, I guess you’re probably not a millennial, so just keep reading.

You see, we “millennials” are not all the same. We “millennials” are some of the most intelligent, creative individuals in this present day.

Whether other generations want to accept it or not, we are here and we are not going anywhere anytime soon.

We are tired of the judgement. We are tired of the assumptions that all “millennials” are the same because our age says so. We are tired of the criticism that we continually face and this is what we want you to stop saying:

1) You’re a “millennial”, so why should I hire you?

This question is one for the books. I cannot tell you how many times this question is thrown around. What does this even mean? What are you insinuating? That because I fall into the category of a millennial that I’m incapable of working?

Let me start by saying that it is proven research that millennials have more student loan debt than any other living generation (google, people, it really works). With that said, millennials are money hungry. We crave more and we certainly are not afraid to work our asses off to prove we are hungrier for more. (Side note) we are the biggest generation yet.

Therefore, we are the mass majority of job seekers in this current time. Need I say more here?

2) You “millennials” are content

As I said above, we have more student loan debt than ANY other generation of our time. SOME millennials might be OK living paycheck to paycheck with debt up to their eyeballs, but I’m simply speaking on behalf of those millennials that are NOT content and don’t want to drown in a pool of debt.

We are always soul searching, seeking better opportunities and creating new innovative business ideas and we will not stop until we bring those ideas to life.

Take Snapchat for instance, do you think a 25 & 26-year-old were “content” when they were attending Stanford University and casually thought up the idea of snapping disappearing pics to your friends? No way. That idea didn’t happen overnight, it was one that took an immense amount of time and effort to think up. Perfect example of not all millennials are content with their minimum wage jobs, or living off of their parents’ money, or working a 9-5 “career” that they do not even enjoy.

3) How is your 3-5 years of work experience relevant to this position?

Well good sir or Madame, or whatever you prefer to be called (since you’re judging us millennials right off the bat I’ll assume you don’t mind me referring to you have your “generation” would), My 2-3 years of experience extends much further when you think about the times we millennials were raised in.

We are technically advanced. We grew up in a time of a digital life. Cell phones, computers, non-disposal cameras and GPS! We do not need to use a traditional map anymore folks. We are up to date on the latest technology, we are excel and word savvy, and we do not still use fax machines (sorry we have actually upgraded to scanning via email). We are simple; therefore, we are here to help simplify life and teach you a helpful thing or two.  Just like your 20+ years of knowledge and experience can benefit us millennials, so can our “3-5” years of experience.

So, grab a pen and paper, and take note. Oh, and by the way some of us “millennial” still like the old school way of doing things too.

4) Millennials think they are “entitled “to be handed everything

Entitled to what exactly? To have a chance to prove that we can be extremely hard-working individuals and want to be recognized and compensated accordingly for our hard work?

Not all of us feel entitled, but best believe those of us who do not feel this way certainly do feel though that our hard work should go more noticed than someone more “experienced” on the job. Just like other generations are adults, we too are adults, and we don’t need someone to constantly hold our hands. We do appreciate words of affirmation that our work ethic is leading us down a successful path and that alone can be enough recognition for us.

A strong millennial knows their worth and value and they appreciate when it doesn’t go unrecognized or unappreciated.

I think I speak for any of us when I say I will never understand how traditional companies will continue to succeed with the mindset that more experience over lesser experience is the road to always travel down.

Being open-minded to trying something new (hint-hint the younger less experienced hire) goes a long way.

Last, but not least (drumroll please…….)

5) Millennials are the future

This one might confuse you as to why we millennials hate to hear this, but let me explain.

By constantly saying this, other generations expectations can be overwhelming to the point that we “millennials” will hit a breaking point of carrying too much weight on our shoulders.

The best thing other generations can teach us is to have us under promise and continue to over deliver. With this concept millennials can continue to think up the next new facebook and let the creative juices keep flowing.

Some of us might fall under the terrible stereotypical “millennials” other generations make us out to be, but for those of us who are just trying to make a difference in this world, stop judging us and start appreciating us. Stop the negativity and look at “millennials” as a positive impact on todays businesses.

I think the saying goes, “There is power in positivity”, and we “millennials” are definitely that, powerful individuals.


Photo by Simon Abrams on Unsplash

Good Vibes, Life, Overcoming Obstacles, positivity

The most underrated, free gift life gives us that we often overlook:

Its true when they say the best things in life are free. In fact, the freest gift this life has to offer is often the most underrated & overlooked gift of all.


Have you ever opened a dictionary and actually looked up the definition of time? To my surprise the definition didn’t align with my original thoughts on time. Typically, we think of time as a measurement of minutes or hours, when in fact time is much more than a measurable thing.

Per the online dictionary:

“Time- the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.”

Without time, we wouldn’t be able to exist, we would just “be”. To exist is much more than a physical being. To exist is to progress throughout life and to constantly evolve as a being and to learn from our existence each day by taking into account that our time to exist will eventually run out.

I’ve come to realize with age that time only seems to speed up, rather than slow down or remain at a steady pace. The days that felt as if they lasted weeks go by in the blink of an eye. The vacations that seemed so long that you couldn’t wait to get back “home”, now never feel long enough.

See the thing about time is that it actually never slows down. It always remains constant. We cannot control time and the fact that we only have 86,400 seconds each passing day, but we can control how we use our time. We can control how much we exist, how much we evolve with time, and lastly how to stop waiting for the right time to take advantage of life’s most precious gift of all.

There is no “right time” to start existing. There is no “right time” to learn from our past to create better futures. Time is a continued progress; therefore, the right time is always in the now.

So stop waiting for the “right time” to make a change. To tell someone how you feel. To start a new chapter.  To spend more time with the ones that mean the most to you. Stop waiting for the right time to simply learn to appreciate the free gift we as humans have been given and often do not appreciate enough.

With each passing day, with each passing second, with no action to exist, you will let time slip through your hands faster than you can blink an eye and be stuck in the past or present.

After all, according to the dictionary time is not a measurable unit. Time is a continual process to create constant existence.

So, start existing. Start creating the right moments, rather than waiting for what you believe to be the right moments, because before you realize that there is no such thing as the “right time”, you will be indefinitely stuck living life just “being” in the present, rather than progressing towards the future.

You might not be able to control when the sun sets or rises, but you can control & learn to take advantage of the greatest and most free gift life has to offer, Time.


Photo by Wil Stewart on Unsplash


Life, Millennials, Overcoming Obstacles

8 Obstacles Every 20-Something Needs To Overcome In Order To Become Who They’re Meant To Be

Throughout this crazy journey that we call life, each & everyday is another opportunity to grow and reach the full potential of becoming the person you were meant to be.  Change is the only constant entity of life and learning to adapt to change will ultimately help you succeed in overcoming any obstacles thrown your way.

We often find ourselves feeling stuck, especially in our 20’s as life begins to change drastically during these years. From leaving college, to finding the perfect career, to discovering how to adult, your 20’s are scary and you’re going to feel lost at times. You’re going to question who you are, who you’re meant to be and your interests, priorities and friendships will change over time. I promise you are not alone in this process and you will soon become who you’re meant to be when you finally learn how to overcome these 10 obstacles every 20 something individual will come across.

1) Learning to let go of things you cannot control

You’re going to come across this obstacle MANY times throughout your 20’s, but here is the good news, life goes on. You might not be able to align every star in the universe, but you can learn to align the path of your future. For the things you can control, focus on controlling them. If you’re unhappy with your job, leave. If you’re unhappy where you’re living, make that move. If you’re unhappy with your current partner, be honest and move on. If you’re no longer interested in the same things as your peers, develop new friendships with people who share similar interests.

You can at any given moment make a change. You might not be able to control the weather, or the actions of those who will inflict hurt upon you, or the fact that your boss is a miserable jerk, but you can control the outcome of the obstacle you are being faced with by taking appropriate actions.

Don’t get so caught up on what you can’t control that you let it consume who you become.

You’re the only one who can control your happiness and that is one thing every twenty something should take advantage of.

2) Getting out of your comfort zone

Let me first start off by saying, NOTHING good comes from a comfort zone. If you stay where you are comfortable, you will not fully grow into whom you’re supposed to be.

You must learn that difficult times and challenges often lead to discovering some of your greatest qualities and strengths. How will you ever reach your full potential if you always take the comfortable route?

Recently I was faced with the question “if you had 2 routes to choose from, one being easy & the outcome being a great amount of money, or two, the route in which you will face many challenges, but once you come to the end, the reward will be much better, which would you take”?  Without hesitation, I answered the route in which I will face many challenges.

One day I decided to pack up and move across 3 states, I was broke & sleeping on the hardwood floor and had to start meeting people in a city where I knew no one. Some may say this sounds terrible, but it was this very obstacle that challenged me to get out of my comfort zone.

I now needed to go out and meet new people, and believe it or not as uncomfortable as that hardwood floor was, I have looked back on the experience and am thankful that I overcame the obstacle of learning to get out of my comfort zone. The path surely wasn’t an easy route, but I now am successful and have a better appreciation for the things we often take for granted because I learned to stop taking the “comfortable” route.

3) Learning to be comfortable Alone

This is an obstacle extremely difficult to overcome in your 20’s, especially because you’re reaching the age where half of your friends are beginning to get married/engaged or have children and some have settled in a relationship out of comfort and the remainder of those who do not fall into neither of these categories are getting so drunk on Friday nights that they hit up taco bell at 3am still.

The thing is we often do not even realize it, but we spend so much time with others that when faced with spending time alone our minds wander and we feel extreme sadness & loneliness.  How will you ever know who you truly are and what you truly enjoy doing, unless you spend the most time with the most important person in your life, yourself.

It wasn’t until I started going out to nice dinners alone, that I learned it’s not so bad after all and my most creative ideas come from those “lonely meals”. TREAT YOURSELF. I have discovered I appreciate treating myself and do not need others to always do that for me.

When I started spending more time alone, I realized I no longer had the same interests /hobbies, I became more aware of those around me and started realizing I was no longer interested in spending time with individuals who I don’t have much in common with. I let go of friendships & relationships that I was outgrowing. I made myself a PRIORITY. I took certain days to dedicate to ME TIME.

Let me tell you, now that I am comfortable alone, I will never settle for anything because I would much rather be comfortable alone than temporarily comfortable in any given situation.

4) Overcoming obligation

So often we find ourselves doing things out of obligation. We say yes, because we think we have to or because we think we owe it to someone. Sometimes you will take on more than you can handle and one day you will find yourself overwhelmed and breaking down because of this obstacle.

In those moments you can continue to cause yourself stress, or you can learn to overcome the obstacle of obligation by taking a stand.

Say no to plans you do not want to take on, tell your boss you have too much on your plate to handle another project, stop doing favors for those who do not do favors for you, and stop taking second dates when the first one sucked in the first place.

You do not owe anyone, ANYTHING.

 You do however owe yourself a pat on the back for realizing this. Once you overcome obligation, you will feel one thousand times better saying the words NO.

5) Maintaining a work/life balance

One of the most difficult obstacles in your 20’s is learning to maintain a healthy work/life balance. Fresh out of college you come into the work place at the bottom of the totem pole. If you’re a motivated individual, you will want to do whatever it takes to work your way up the pole as quickly as possible.

Sometimes doing too much at work will negatively affect your life outside of work. If you get too worn down from working so hard, you will not feel like doing much outside of the work place. This is UNHEALTHY. This will lead to unnecessary stress, anxiety or even depression.

You need to have fun, let your hair down and stop taking your work home everyday. What doesn’t get finished today, can be completed tomorrow, unless of course you have a deadline tomorrow at 8am, then that sh*t needs completed before you leave by EOD.

Again, DO NOT TAKE YOUR WORK HOME. Trust me on this one. I promise you will thank me later.

6) Feeling like you need others approval

When it comes to making decisions for your own life, you are the only person whose approval is necessary. Having opinions from those who are important to you is beneficial in certain situations, just be sure to only ask for a few opinions when making life decisions. If you gather up too many, you will find yourself confused, overwhelmed and hesitant as to which decision is best for you, and again you are the only one who knows what is best for you.

You don’t need anyone’s approval on how to live your life. If you continue doing things strictly because of what others suggest is best for you, you will never continue to grow and learn what it is that is truly best for you and you will delay the development of becoming who you are meant to become.

7) Fear of rejection

Being rejected is OK and not a bad thing. Being rejected should be a minor setback that welcomes a major comeback. Whether you were rejected from a job you thought you really wanted, or a significant other no longer wants you to be a part of their live, or perhaps you didn’t get accepted to the grad school you applied to, rejection comes in many forms and never brings a good feeling, but once you realize rejection isn’t something to be afraid of, you will be rewarded with something better.

When you’re feeling rejected, pick up the pieces and MOVE ON.

Come back working harder to get into that grad school, realize there is someone better out there for you, keep applying to jobs out of your league and perfect your interviewing skills.

If you let the fear of rejection overcome you, you will continuously fail and again not grow into who you are meant to be.

Life isn’t meant to be easy, things are not meant to come easy and rejection is just another obstacle you will face throughout not only your 20’s, but throughout your entire life.

Don’t be afraid of rejection; believe in your ability to make a major comeback.

8) Learning to live in the moment

Stop planning out your life in your 20’s. Stop Now.

If you put a time frame on when you want things to happen or when you think they should happen, they will never happen.

If you would have asked me at 21 where I would be today, I would have said married by 23, kids by 25. Let me tell you, that is NOT even close to where I am today. I thought I had to have things happen according to my “time line”. I always felt I needed to strategically plan out my entire life for the next 5-10 years and I was wrong. I got so caught up in planning for the future that I stopped enjoying the present. Life happens and when you’re busy worrying so much about the future, you will forget to live in the moment and enjoy the little things. Living in the moment in your 20’s is crucial for your overall development of becoming who you are meant to become.

Some of lifes greatest moments will be the ones you didn’t see coming or that you didn’t plan ahead for. Stop planning and start enjoying the now.

Obstacles are tough, and they are meant to be just that.

If life were easy and every road you traveled down had a reward at the end of it, then traffic would be so backed up because everyone would travel that same path.

Your 20’s are some of your best years, most selfish years and also most rewarding years of life.

The sooner you overcome these obstacles, the sooner you will become who you want to be, who you are meant to be and who you have always wanted to become. Focus on you.

After all, you are the only one in control of your happiness and you are the only one who can hold yourself back from becoming who you are meant to be.


Photo by Aziz Acharki on Unsplash


Every Storm runs out of rain

When a traumatic event hits, sometimes we sink faster than the titanic after hitting the iceberg. I say “we” for anyone who has felt the pain, sorrows, & struggles of any tragedy. We tend to let it overcome us in its entirety, sometimes without even realizing it.

We find ourselves blocking out the positives in the world around us and focusing in on all the negativity. We ignore any sunlight that’s trying to shine through the dark clouds. When life shakes us up, we tend to forget just how beautiful this life can truly be.

We forget to breathe.

& Sometimes we forget to put on our raincoats and soon we are soaking in our own struggles.

Maybe, You lost your job. Lost a loved one. Failed that exam. Hurt the one who loves you. Made that mistake. Traveled that path you said you would never go down.

You are not alone and this is your reminder.

Just like the weather changes daily, so does life. The only constant in life is change. When you can accept that, the fifty-pound weight on your shoulders will finally be lifted. The good that comes today, may not come tomorrow, inhale it. The bad that may come tomorrow exhale it. Just like inhaling tobacco from a long drag is harmful for your body, so is inhaling the bad that life throws your way.

If you forget to exhale the bad, it will eat you alive just like a cancer. You will never see clearly and find the beauty after your storms. Just like that weather reporter predicted sunshine, and we got rain, life isn’t meant to always be right. We are given storms to challenge ourselves, to learn from them, and to come out stronger than we would ever be without them.

The storms of life are always temporary & only have the power to defeat you if YOU let them. You are in charge of your own happiness, and YOU are the only one holding yourself back from that.

You will find a better job, you will realize your loved one wouldn’t want to see you suffer, you can re-take the course, you can make amends with the people you hurt, and you can always take the path to a better future. You are not defined by the struggles you’ve gone through, you are defined by the by the strength you gained from the struggles.

You might not always see the entire rainbow, but I promise you, one day you will finally see that pot of gold, because eventually every storm runs out of rain.


Photo by Jared Erondu on Unsplash